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The Gracie Guide: A Girls Guide to all Things Football



By: Gracie Watkins

While, we are an academic school somewhere, buried deep in our closets behind our gold rimmed bar carts, Penn State is all about the next party. People searching for it, people getting in, and then, there’s the people that get turned away at the door. I mean, no wonder we ranked in the 60s for national universities, we were too busy ranking number 3 in party schools (according to Barstool in 2022). 

So, it is makes sense why every Saturday, Sunday, and Monday, our group chats ping as we try to study: “football watch party at my house” or “My tailgate is in Lot 12”. It’s another excuse to party. From September to February, our girlhood is dominated by football. 

Frankly, and I want to sincerely apologize to all boyfriends, brothers, dads, and guy friends when I say this, I have absolutely no idea of what is happening on the field. It might be slightly sexist to call this a “Guide to all Things Football”. I know so many women who love the sport and watch it avidly. I just happen to be not one of those women. 

Don’t get me wrong, I live for tailgates, and I love to go to a watch party every now and then.  But, when it comes to watching the game, I usually keep my phone close by to stave off the boredom. 

So, for research purposes, of course, I went to my boyfriend’s house on a Sunday night to watch the Eagles game. And, I can tell you, it is truly the most wonderful time of the year for men. They dust off their game-day gear and throw on their favorite NFL jersey. After a few hours of yelling at the TV, I am serious when I say that my boyfriend is not going to take off his Kelly-Green jersey from now until February. 

What I learned from my excursion, and didn’t realize, was the hometown team is half the battle.The other half? Fantasy Football. While this might take some inner testosterone, us girls can get in on the fun too. 

My friend Emily joined a few leagues this year, and no, she does not watch football at all. Instead, she picked the cutest guys on the team. And, to the utter fury of her guy friends that spend hours studying the screen for their picks, she is winning. 

I don’t know why men complain about their picks. Maybe they should ask their girlfriends.

This weekend might be one of the most awaited games of the season, well maybe for me. It is finally not rainy and gross in State College, and three of my best friends are having tailgates within walking distance of each other. It is my kind of day. 

A Penn State tailgate for girls consists of three key elements: outfits, alcohol, and chicken baskets. The Whiteout game is basically a runway. I may be a little extra and collaged my outfits on a PowerPoint months in advance, but for most girls here, it takes at least two weeks of planning. And, that is girlhood.

So, maybe we don’t know the names of every defensive lineman on the team, but, I will show up with cute ribbons in my hair, a beer in one hand, and a chicken basket in the other. 

Let’s hope my boyfriend takes his jersey off to wash it every once in a while. 

Until next time,

Gracie

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